How To Tell Your Partner About an Unexpected Pregnancy

The chances of needing to tell a partner about an unexpected pregnancy at some point are pretty high when you consider that nearly half of all pregnancies in the United States are unintended. Even if you have a healthy relationship, it is common to feel a little nervous about telling your spouse/partner that you are pregnant when that wasn’t part of your plans right now.

So, how exactly do you tell them about an unexpected pregnancy? This article will discuss what you can do to make that conversation flow a little easier.

Timing Matters

When you tell your spouse/partner about an unexpected pregnancy, timing matters. Choose to share the news when you have plenty of time to talk or simply can spend time together afterward to process your thoughts and feelings. In other words, telling them that you are unexpectedly pregnant just before you both leave for work would not be ideal.

If either of you is significantly preoccupied or stressed, it may be best to wait. Talking about an unexpected pregnancy just after an argument or before an important job interview could start this journey off on the wrong foot.

Another aspect of timing is to tell your spouse/partner soon after you discover that you are pregnant. This way, you haven’t already spent a great deal of time moving through the phases of coping with an unexpected pregnancy while he is just getting started in the first phase of shock.

Where To Tell Your Spouse/Partner About an Unexpected Pregnancy

In-person and in the comfort of your own space is the ideal place to tell your spouse/partner about an unexpected pregnancy. This will give them a chance to respond honestly, and you can talk freely in a private setting compared to out in public. Showing your partner the positive pregnancy test helps to alleviate his shock, and you probably wouldn’t want to pull that test strip out at your local coffee shop.

Unless your spouse/partner is away for an extended period of time, such as military deployment, definitely do not tell him about an unexpected pregnancy by phone or text message. Next, we’ll discuss what to say because words matter.

How To Tell Your Spouse/Partner About an Unexpected Pregnancy – Choosing Your Words

Before you talk with your spouse/partner, it is critical to remind yourself that you did not get pregnant by yourself. An unexpected pregnancy is not something you need to walk on eggshells about or carry guilt or shame over. Once your mindset is ready, you can think about the words to use when you tell them that you are pregnant.

You are not responsible for your partner’s response to an unexpected pregnancy, but you can choose words that may help set the tone for your conversation about it. For example, consider the difference between hearing, “I have terrible news,” and “My period is late, so I took a pregnancy test today and found out we are pregnant.”

Approach talking with your partner about an unplanned pregnancy with the confidence that this is an issue you can tackle together. Use words that are natural to you but think ahead of time about how you want to phrase them directly and positively.  For example, say, “We are pregnant” rather than “I’m pregnant,” because this did not happen all by yourself.

Give Your Spouse/Partner Space and Time to Process the News

If you are not looking at the pregnancy test results for the first time together, your partner will be in the difficult position of having to react to the news in front of you, and that’s not easy. He may feel compelled to filter his reaction so he does not hurt your feelings, or he may react with unfiltered honesty – and that can be painful if he is initially unhappy about the pregnancy. However, this is not a free pass to treat you disrespectfully, which is never okay.

The moment just after telling your spouse/partner about an unplanned pregnancy is the time to “hold space” for him. Holding space means he has a chance to experience his thoughts without pressure to discuss them right away. He may need to process the news on his own for a bit before coming together to discuss it with you. Don’t take his first reaction personally if it is negative – he is most likely responding to his fears rather than you.

Like you, your spouse/partner will move through many different responses as he comes to grip with the news of a pregnancy neither of you saw coming. Common responses men have to an unexpected pregnancy include:

  • Happiness
  • Shock
  • Fear
  • Denial
  • Anger

Take One Step at a Time

There is no denying that difficult conversations come with the territory of an unexpected pregnancy. Take one step at a time, and do not make any permanent decisions while your emotions are high or conflicted.

Once you have moved beyond the initial shock, you can move on to discuss your feelings about topics ranging from your hopes, dreams, and goals to your fears and next practical steps to making a pregnancy decision. It is essential to take one step at a time as you share honestly about how you feel about your pregnancy options, including parenting, adoption, and abortion.

  • Step 1 – Confirm your pregnancy

Your first step is to confirm how far along you are in your pregnancy and verify that your pregnancy is viable. A viable pregnancy is one that is likely to carry to term successfully rather than end in miscarriage. You can get these answers only by a pregnancy ultrasound performed by your healthcare provider or at an unbiased pregnancy center such as Willow Womens Center.

  • Step 2 – Weigh your options and make your decision

After you know you have a viable pregnancy and how far along you are, talk with an experienced pregnancy advocate who can review your options with you and your partner. The licensed healthcare professionals at Willow Womens Center can provide the information you need about parenting, adoption, and abortion so that you can make a confident decision about your unexpected pregnancy. You will never feel rushed or pressured to make a pregnancy decision; instead, you will be empowered to make the best decision for you and your family.

Willow Womens Center Is Here for You

At Willow Womens Center, we understand how confusing an unplanned pregnancy can be. We compassionately provide confidential, no-cost services to help you make an informed decision about your unexpected pregnancy. Make an appointment at Willow Womens Center today.


Pregnancy Resources in South Beloit
Pregnancy Resources in South Beloit

Do you live in or near South Beloit, IL, and think you might be unexpectedly pregnant? Willow Womens Center is nearby to provide the compassionate support you need during this uncertain time.

No-cost Pregnancy Services

Willow Womens Center is an authentic medical clinic staffed by licensed medical professionals. We offer pregnancy services to you at no cost, including:

  • High-quality pregnancy testing

Even if you had a positive pregnancy test result at home, we will run another medical-grade pregnancy test for you so you can get the written verification needed for support services.

  • Pregnancy ultrasounds

It is vital to have an ultrasound even if you are considering abortion. An ultrasound provides critical information such as how far along you are and if your pregnancy is viable or not.

  • Unbiased and accurate information

We understand that only YOU can make the best decision for you personal circumstances, which is why we are passionate about equipping you with unbiased and accurate information about your pregnancy and your options. We want to empower you to make an informed decision.

  • Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) Testing

If your pregnancy test is positive, we provide testing for two common STIs: gonorrhea and chlamydia.

  • Community referrals

We want you to be connected to the community resources you need to be healthy and provided for. We will offer referral information for further testing or support services available in the community.

Our compassionate staff members will never judge you for being unexpectedly pregnant, for the choice you make about your pregnancy, or anything else. We care about you and strive to empower you to make a confident decision about your pregnancy.

Willow Womens Center is located in Beloit, WI, near Beloit Memorial Hospital and across the street from McDonalds at 2680 Prairie Avenue. Contact us today for your confidential appointment.

About South Beloit

Nestled along the scenic Turtle Creek and Rock River, the city of South Beloit, Illinois is located in Winnebago County and bordered to the north by Beloit, Wisconsin along the Illinois-Wisconsin state line.

Although South Beloit is only six square miles, it provides many riveting highlights to visitors ranging from outdoor recreation to shopping. Places of interest in South Beloit include:

  • Angela’s Attic

Angela’s Attic is a 35,000 square foot, family-owned and operated antique shop. They have over 100 dealers who sell unique antiques, collectibles, and memorabilia.

  • Blackhawk Farms Raceway

Blackhawk Farms Raceway is a fun place for racing enthusiasts. Amateur and professional drivers alike will be challenged along the nearly two-mile asphalt course, which incorporates seven turns. Spectators can be wowed by motorcycle, bicycle, go-cart, and sports car races on the weekends.

  • DC Estate Winery

DC Estate Winery is a beautiful vineyard, winery, and event venue, which is also a family-owned and operated business. Visitors feel like they are stepping into the hills of Tuscany with its magnificent views and warm, family hospitality.

  • Nature at The Confluence

Surrounded by the stunning Rock River, Turtle Creek, and Kelly Creek, Nature at The Confluence is an urban environmental center that opened in 2017 to connect people with nature.

  • Pearl Lake

Pearl Lake is a privately owned RV resort and lake that provides pristine aqua-colored water in which to scuba dive and swim.


Pregnancy Resources in Evansville
Pregnancy Resources in Evansville

If you feel unsure or scared due to an unplanned pregnancy, Willow Womens Center is here for you. We understand the shock and uncertainty you are facing and can help make sense of your next steps. We provide confidential pregnancy services at no cost so you can get the answers you deserve to make an informed decision for your future.

Pregnancy Resources in Evansville

It is not uncommon to feel helpless when you are unexpectedly pregnant. Yet, our compassionate, licensed healthcare professionals at Willow Womens Center are available to empower you with the information you need to be confident again. If you live in Evansville, we are just 35 minutes away in Beloit via WI 213 – N.

Our caring advocates can help you take one step at a time. Our services include:

  • Medical-grade pregnancy testing: Even if you already took a home pregnancy test and the results were positive, we will provide a medical-grade pregnancy test, which allows us to present you with written verification of your pregnancy.
  • Limited pregnancy ultrasound: The next step is a limited pregnancy ultrasound to confirm a viable pregnancy since a pregnancy test cannot do that, and to determine the age of the pregnancy.
  • Sexually transmitted infection (STI) testing: If your pregnancy test is positive, we also offer STI testing. An untreated STI can lead to you contracting an infection such as pelvic inflammatory disease, which can lead to reproductive system damage and infertility. (We currently offer this service to all residents of the Stateline area.)
  • Referrals: If your STI test is positive, we provide a prescription (Chlamydia) or referrals (Gonorrhea) so you can receive the proper treatment. We can also provide various community resources,which offer tangible assistance.

If you think you might be unexpectedly pregnant, contact Willow Womens Center today for your confidential appointment. YOU are our priority, and we believe you are capable of making the right choice for you and your future.

About Evansville

The historically-rich community of Evansville offers traditional Midwest small-town life advantages together with perks of big city living — all in a beautiful setting. Evansville is the fastest growing city in Rock County and is accessibly located near Janesville, Madison, and Beloit, Wisconsin.

One of the highlights of this friendly and family-oriented city is its brick-lined Main Street and nearly 300 historical sites within a five-block walking radius. According to the Wisconsin Historical Society, Evansville is home to “the finest collection of 1840s to 1915 architecture of any small town in Wisconsin.”

Anyone who enjoys the outdoors will appreciate Leonard-Leota Park, where visitors can canoe, fish, ice-skate, and even log-roll on stream-fed Lake Leota. In addition to water activities, the park also provides opportunities for baseball, softball, basketball, tennis, hiking, picnicking, and skating. There are four playground areas, as well as a swimming and lap pool on-site at the Veteran’s Memorial Aquatic Center.

Residents and visitors of Evansville have enjoyed dining at Night Owl Food & Spirits for over three decades. They build up the community with fun through trivia nights and their pool and dart leagues.

Just Beyond the Willow is one of Evansville’s newest specialty vintage boutiques that will delight shoppers looking for unique treasures. It showcases items from talented artisans and is a welcome addition to the thriving art community.


Pregnancy Resources in Rockton
Pregnancy Resources in Rockton

If you live in or near Rockton, IL, and think you might be unexpectedly pregnant, Willow Womens Center is available to help you through this uncertain time.  

Willow Womens Center is a real medical clinic staffed with caring, licensed healthcare professionals. You deserve to be empowered with accurate information, so you feel equipped to make a decision that is best for you about your unplanned pregnancy. We are here to provide just the information and services you need. 

Your autonomy and ability to make decisions for your life are highly valued here. You will never be pressured or judged about your pregnancy — or how you decide to move forward — because we believe that only you can make the right decision for you. To make that possible, we take a holistic approach to healthcare by supporting you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. 

We are also committed to eliminating barriers to your being able to access the pregnancy services you need. For that reason, you will never be charged at Willow Womens Center, and nothing will be submitted to your insurance. Services we provide without cost to you include: 

  • Medical grade pregnancy testing 
  • Written pregnancy verification  
  • Limited pregnancy ultrasound 
  • Unbiased education about your pregnancy options 
  • Sexually transmitted infection testing when indicated

At Willow Womens Center, you can rest assured that we will protect your privacy. We will not tell anyone when you call or visit because it is not only your right, but we also desire for you to feel safe here when you receive your pregnancy services.

We welcome you to contact us and make a confidential appointment today. 

About Rockton

The picturesque Village of Rockton, Illinois is located in northern Winnebago County about four miles over the Wisconsin-Illinois state line. Although it is a small community of approximately 8,000 residents, Rockton boasts unique beauty and opportunities, unlike many smaller towns.  

Rockton is situated on the Rock River, which provides abundant recreational opportunities for all. Visitors often bring binoculars to Jensen Forest Preserve, where they can hike, fish, and birdwatch. Bald eagles and osprey fish along the river at this preserve and it provides a fascinating nature experience.  

Rockton also provides opportunities on the Rock River for boating and kayaking enthusiasts to have fun, get exercise, and make memories on the water.  Avid fishers and novices alike take pleasure in their sport at the Rock River fishery in Rockton, which has over 80 species of fish; this location is best known for catfish, walleye, and crappie.  

A stroll through quaint downtown Rockton reveals high-quality opportunities for shopping and dining.  Antique shoppers will love the vast array of rare finds. After a day of perusing local shops, eateries like the Fatt Cat Café will satisfy and energize. The Fatt Cat Café is a charming farmhouse serving up savory burgers and their famous gourmet cupcakes for dessert.   

Diaryhäus can be the perfect way to end a day in Rockton. They make homemade ice cream and sorbets and even offer dairy-free options.


Pregnancy Resources in Janesville

It’s difficult to know where to turn when you discover you are unexpectedly pregnant. When you are in shock, it is hard to determine what to do next or where to get the accurate information you deserve so you can decide what is best for you regarding your pregnancy.

Undoubtedly, this feels like one of the most difficult challenges you have ever faced. At Willow Womens Center, we understand what you are going through. We are a genuine medical clinic with licensed medical professionals on staff who can provide confidential support and accurate facts – with compassion and without bias – so you can make an informed decision about your pregnancy without regrets.

If you live in or near Janesville, Wisconsin, one of your resources is the Pregnancy Helpline of Janesville. More information can be found at https://www.pregnancy-helpline.org. If you need medical testing beyond their scope of service, Willow Womens Center in Beloit is just 10 miles south of Janesville, offering no-cost services such as pregnancy test, limited ultrasound and STI testing as well as our new mentoring program for pregnant women.

When faced with an unexpected pregnancy, your first step is to confirm by ultrasound that you have a viable pregnancy . Up to 20% of all pregnancies do not carry to term, and 80% of all miscarriages occur in the first three months. An ultrasound helps to determine if the pregnancy is in the correct location and if there is a fetal heartbeat.

If your pregnancy test is positive, we may also offer Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) testing to prevent further transmission or damage to your reproductive system from an undetected infection. STI testing is an important step, even if you do not have symptoms, since it is common for most women with an STI to be symptomless.

Our caring staff will also help you explore each of your pregnancy options. We strive to answer all of your questions about pregnancy, abortion, community resources, and more.

Only you can decide the best course of action for your unexpected pregnancy, and our goal is to empower you, so you feel equipped and ready to make a knowledgeable decision. You can get through this with confidence!

About Janesville

Janesville — “Wisconsin’s Great Outside” is home to 65,000 residents and offers the beauty of nature along with a rich history, plentiful lodging, casual to fine dining, shopping, recreation, and entertainment.

Janesville is located forty miles southeast of Madison and just ten miles north of Willow Womens Center in Beloit. It’s easily accessible just off the 39/90 Interstate and near four state highways (51, 14, 11, and 26 ).

An incredible thirty miles of Wisconsin’s trail system is woven into the city of Janesville and connects many neighborhoods, parks, and attractions. Located on the Rock River, you will be awed by the picturesque glacial terrain.

A large portion of Janesville’s Trail System is made up of the Ice Age National Scenic Trail, which provides a thousand miles of picturesque landscapes created by the glacier that once covered a portion of Wisconsin. Since most of the trail system is paved, it is perfect for running, walking, hiking, biking, and rollerblading. You can even enjoy snowshoeing and cross country skiing in the winter in addition to backpacking and camping in the warmer months.

Families can be delighted as they make memories together at the Camden Playground in Janesville. This award-winning playground was the largest, most handicapped-accessible playground in the world when volunteers built it in 1993. It has been the model for more than 200 other accessible playgrounds across the globe. It was renovated and reopened in June 2017 so visitors can have good, safe fun.